Daydreamer At Heart

There is nothing more enticing then my daydreams of traveling the world! Oh the idea of sipping coffee while walking through the brick-lined alleyways of Italy, or roaming the aisle's of the largest bookstore {Powells Book's} in Portland, Oregon. The inspiring thoughts of being a nomad and wondering, experiencing, and taking new adventures is so tempting to the free-spirited side of my soul! The romanticized view of my fantasies and my wishful thinking leave little room for reality and practicality! I suppose it wouldn't be such a charming daydream if I allowed logistics to ruin my minds unrestricted wondering! And let me tell you, recently, I have been practicing my wondering skills!

The realistic side of my daydreams always bring me back to earth. And it's back in reality that I remember how expensive traveling is (!), and how much preparation and time it takes to plan seemingly spontaneous getaways! While I understand the practical side of taking trips and seeing the world, I don't want to discount my desires altogether. I want channel it. To focus on ways that I can experience traveling and ways in which I can see the world, even if it's on a small scale.

For me, my dreams look like traveling and seeing the world. For you it might be something totally different. Your dreams may include a promotion at work or getting married and starting a family. Whatever your dream is, figure out how you can channel it. If your dream isn't being fulfilled right now, in this moment, sit down and really contemplate some of the small (maybe even practical) steps you can take. It could look like spending extra time learning about your business in order to be prepared and ready for if/when a promotion comes. Or it could look like learning how to trust God in a greater way, believing that He will bring a compatible partner when He sees fit.

Even if you have to start small, really, really small... It's okay! As cliche as this may sound, don't give up on your dreams. Continue a tireless pursuit to see them be fulfilled. Make your plans but let God order your steps!

I give everything over to You Lord

Time To Tip... And Tip Well

Awhile back my dad and I were out to lunch and it came time for the best part of the meal... the bill! ($$$) I have grown up seeing my dad tip based off of how well he was served and treated. And I really thought nothing about it when I was younger. Then I got older and got my first job at a coffee shop, where people tipped (or didn't) and it was THEN I realized the value of tipping people! Yes... Like tipping a server after a meal. So, before my dad paid for our meal, I shared some thoughts about the whole idea of tipping people based off of how "well" they treated me or how fast they served me. Here is what I shared with my dad:

I love people. I love to bless people, encourage people, and give them above and beyond what others may think they "deserve." That includes tipping. I have never based my "tipping-etiquette" on how well I am served or how "on top of it" my waiter or waitress was. And I'll be honest, I've had some pretty "bad" restaurant experiences. Anything from my server forgetting items I've requested (over and over), spilling drinks on me, one server wasn't able to concentrate due to his hungover, and other times I've simply had servers that are openly rude! (I call that being SPICY)! But that has never affected the dollar amount I write down on the little line that says, "Tip:  _____.____"  

WHY?! Well, I am sure we can break down that logic (tipping based off of being served well or not) and figure out a way to justify tipping poorly. But my thought process isn't based on logic it's based on blessing. And those are two very different entities! I correlate tipping to grace. Far fetched? I think NOT! You know that little thing God gives us no matter how many times we jack things up? Well... that's grace! It is an undeserved and free gift that is given to us, not based off of how WELL WE SERVE God, rather, it is based off of His greatness. I try to mimic the character that Jesus displays, such as giving generosity and giving above and beyond.

To me, tipping is more of a reflection of me and my character, opposed to the common thought that tipping is a reflection of the character and "performance" of the server.

You never know what people are walking through. Life is crazy! If you have air in your lungs, you'd understand that we all have "off" days. Even servers! (GASP!!) I'm sure we can all agree that we've had a day consumed by bad attitudes, grouches remarks and the lack of desire to serve others. So if you had the opportunity to shed a little generosity to the world, would you take it?

I want people to look at me and see God's love and His grace. For me, that looks like tipping, and tipping well. I guess my dad liked it enough to take on the same thought process. So now, we both tip well, because WE CAN! (Oh and if you can't afford to tip well... it's okay, maybe just eat in! And all the serves said, "AMEN!")

“Grace, then, is grace,–that is to say, it is sovereign, it is free, it is sure, it is unconditional, and it is everlasting.” ~ Alexander Whyte

I give everything over to You Lord

Independent

Back in the day, Kelly Clarkson released a song called, "Miss Independent," and I think I might have listened to it one too many times when I was younger. Because, in the past few months I have been wrestling with this, "I don't need anyone" perspective I have developed. This development didn't just happen overnight, instead, I am coming to find out that it is deeply rooted in past experiences, past hurt and the desire to protect myself from feeling "screwed over."  I posture myself as if I am self-sufficient, lacking the need to have others care for me, love me, check up on me or help me. I must say, I have been told that I make it really easy for others to believe I don't need them or even  value their efforts of trying to love and take care of me. My fear is if I allow myself to feel loved, cherished and important, I will be setting myself up for a huge let down and eventually all I will be left with is a broken heart. Even though, at times, I keep people at arms distance, I know in my heart that we are all created with a desire to be in relationship with others and to have others help us shoulder the burdens this life brings. Unfortunately, the oh so familiar feeling of wanting to protect myself creeps up and puts a wedge between me and the level of intimacy I am allowing to form within my relationships with others. I am finding out that it is a dangerous place to be. But more then dangerous, I am finding out how unhealthy it is to push people away because of my fear of being hurt, letdown, forgotten, or worse... being an inconvenience to others.

I haven't overcome this battle. Yet! {My stab at trying to remain optimistic} But I have been learning a lot about myself and how I operate. Finding out the areas I still need to grow in and the ways I am looking forward to seeing God touch and transform my life.

If you think of it, pray for me. For the fear I have, the guardedness I am clinging to, and for my inability to let people take care of me. I am the furthest thing from where I'd like to be so I figured a good place to start is in prayer.

I give everything over to You Lord