We Celebrate.

 

I had an eventful weekend celebrating the beautiful life of my cousin, Ashley! I joined her by bringing in her 21st birthday with coffee, sushi, late night walk on the Santa Monica Pier, music, 9 people in one hotel room and watching street dancers. But most of all, for me, it was the good conversations, heart-felt honesty, and ability to feel comfortable enough to share our struggles while encouraging each other to keep fighting through this life! Our creativity and need for art and culture is always heightened when we are together. Ash told me this quote when I was visiting her in California, "Small minds discuss people, average minds discuss events, great minds discuss ideas." Every time I am around Ashley, we talk about ideas for the future and plans of how we can partner together in ministry and life. Ashley, you have a beautiful soul. Never forget that you are called to do great things. Don't let anyone stand in your way of achieving your goals and being ALL you can be. 

You are adored and loved, more than you know. 

Your cousin... and forever friend. 

I give everything over to You Lord

I call her "Q"

When I see or meet people, I observe a lot about them. I try to learn their body language, their sayings, their humor, their interests and their likes and dislikes. But most of all, I try to learn about their heart and the natural way that God has designed them. Once you sift through the insecurities, break down walls and build trust, you usually start to see the essence of who somebody is.

The friendships and the people that God has allowed to enter my life are always beautifully orchestrated. He mends and connects people with me in the most unlikely ways. He never seizes to amaze me! He has taught me a lot about friendships and pursuing people. Some of the main concepts God has taught me through building relationships is, people take time, pouring into people can be exhausting but it is always overshadowed by the beautiful blessings it brings, and "change" is not the prerequisite for an authentic friendship or for unconditional love.

Consistent with the way my friendships have gone, I have been able to build a solid friendship the sweet and "swag-a-lishous," Quincie, but it has been a long process with lots of building blocks!  For years now, Q and I have been building on our friendship and it has been slow but steady. We started off our friendship connecting on so many levels. We gladly found out that we both had a passion for dance, art/graffiti, fashion, humor and we have walked through very similar struggles. Through all of the ups and downs in life, I am so blessed to say I have been able to pray and stand with Q during the great seasons and during the tough seasons. I have spent hours praying, cried many tears, sought advice from people I love and respect, all for the goal of being the most equip friend I could be for Quincie. But most of all, I have fought to keep love at the center of our friendship.

To me, Quincie is not like the average girl. She has this undeniable light that radiates from her. When she enters a room heads turn. She is influential and stands with a confidence that most girls her age don't have. She has a heart of gold and she bubbles over with inspiration and passion. Some people dream of having incredible talents, but for Q, it comes natural. She is artistic and creative. She is strong-willed and easy-going. She is a product of the hip-hop culture. She won't eat chocolate ice cream. Her smile is priceless. Her braids are always fresh. When I look at Quincie, I see a brilliant future marked out ahead of her. A future that is filled with great accomplishments and the realization that her life is a gift from God and everything He has poured into her will be used to glorify Him. She won't let people in easily, but she still loves people deeply. I have had to stand outside the door of her heart until she willingly opened the door to let me in. Sometimes she only cracked the door open, but even that has meant the world to me.

Quincie recently text me. We talked for a little and I instantly knew something was up. Then, I got a text that melted my heart. It made all the years I have been desperate to understand her, absolutely worth it. The text read, "I could really use my sister right now." I have always viewed Q as my little sister and even if she doesn't like it, she will always be my little sister! (Sorry not sorry Q!) There was just something so different when I read that text this time.

It has reminded me that people are important and friendships, while they may take years to develop, are a beautiful example of the unconditional love that God pours out on us each day. So Quincie, I will be here for you, for forever. I will applaud you when you achieve your dreams and I will walk with you when you hit a speed bump and need some assistance. I am so thrilled that I get to have a front row seat to the beautiful life you are living. (Even though it doesn't always feel beautiful) Thank you for blessing me with your hugs, your dance moves, your jokes, your style, your passions and your willingness to share your life with me. I am blessed more today because of you. Thank you Q-Bird. I love you.


I give everything over to You Lord

What's Right In Front Of You?

I am ambitious! There is no other way to put it but in those plain terms. I have a little thing inside my mind that is always thinking of ways to reach for the next "GREAT" accomplishment! My ambition can be used as one of my greatest strengths and also my greatest weakness. As I have spent months and years planning for a mighty endeavor that awaits me in the future, I have spent months missing something that was right in front of me, all along.

I have worked at my current job, a web design company, for a little of two years. I have taken the same driving route to work every single day, besides a few abnormal exceptions. I drive the same freeways, sit in the same bumper-to-bumper traffic and I always get off on the same exit. 7th Street and the I10. A busy intersection that sees thousands of cars per day. It wasn't until the past 3-4 months that I started to notice a pattern. A middle aged man, standing on the right side of the road where I exit. This man, everyday, held the same sign that said, "Need money, thank you, God bless." Everyday he had the same heart-warming smile, the same friendly wave, with a limping walk which shouted that he was in pain. I have watched him stand on the road, begging and pleading for help.

Now, usually this is were the critics chime in and make claims that sound like, "He is probably an alcoholic, a drug addict or just lazy. Giving him anything would only be me enabling him." And those very well may be true! But I would like to respond to those people and say, my dad is a recovering alcoholic, personal friends of mine are drug dealers, and I know a lot of lazy people. So what's the difference? Those people, standing on the curb, can very well be someone dear to my heart, and I can't image that I would ever drive by them without stopping and saying, "WHAT are you doing? LET ME HELP!" For some reason, most of us treat the person on the side of the road with less importance and care.

We all have our own excuses, and I'm no different. Until I felt convicted. I thought about the great ambitions and dreams I've been working towards. My hope is to eventually reach intercity, lower socioeconomic homeless teens and young adults. I want to move and start an urban arts center that helps reach the "underdogs" in our world. There is nothing inherently wrong with my dreams, but the conviction came from me realizing that God was giving me opportunities to start NOW and not in the "future." My ambition was cloudy my present reality. I have driven by the same man for months and I have even waved to him. Except I drove by and never gave him food, water, clothes, or money. I had to do something different. I needed to make a change in my perspective and stop waiting until I have some expansive ministry that is helping "save the world," and instead find the urgency about helping people now! The people that are right in front of me.

One morning, I arrived down town 20 minutes earlier than usual, which never happens! Like clockwork, the same man was standing with his sign waving to each passing car. I decided that I needed to stop putting it off and take the time to go to the store. I bought sandwich bags so that I could make care-kits to keep in my car for the houseless people I meet. I filled his with a tooth brush, tooth paste, a cliff bad, chapstick and a verse I wrote on a piece of paper from my car. This was the verse:

2 Corinthians 12:9-10 - "And He has said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness.” Most gladly, therefore, I will rather boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may dwell in me. Therefore I am well content with weaknesses, with insults, with distresses, with persecutions, with difficulties, for Christ’s sake; for when I am weak, then I am strong."

Since Down Town Phoenix is filled with one way streets I had to get back on the freeway going the opposite direction in order to turn around and get off on my usual exit. I started to approach him but the light way green. I had to make a quick decision, drive past him and give him the bag the next day or frustrate all the people behind me by stopping in the middle of the exit. I did the ladder! I rolled down my window. He hurried to my car window and I handed him the bag. We both simultaneously said, "God bless you," and I drove off. The hoking of horns from those behind me were distant sounds that reminded me that our world is too much in a hurry to take care of those around us. 

The next day I woke up and packed a few extra food items that I was planning on giving him. But when I drove up to my exit I didn't see him. From the time I gave him the care-kit until now, (about a month) I have not seen him anywhere. It taught me that when God calls us to respond, we need to respond without hesitation, or else we might miss the God appointed opportunity.

I can't say that I'll always be aware and never walk by an opportunity to help someone, but my goal is to be more aware and proactive. And my hope is, you'll do the same! I don't know if anyone has told you, but combining our willingness with the power of Jesus makes a pretty powerful force! Don't miss what is right in front of you. 

I give everything over to You Lord

A Letter to Jemma Sophia

Dear my darling niece,
 Jemma Sophia

 

It has been quite the emotional week for the family since you've been born. Especially for your parents. You definitely know how to make an entrance! If you haven't been able to feel the love yet, when you grow up, you'll be able to look back and see how many people have been praying for you and how many people have sent their encouragement to all of us. You are my wonderful little niece and I love you more than words could express. This week alone, I have felt and experienced everything from pure joy and excitement to fear and nervousness. It has sincerely broken my heart to watch you go through so much. The image of you laying in the tiny bed, your second day of life, with wires attached to you everywhere, will forever be burned in my mind. That way, when God heals your strong but petite body, we can look back and praise Him for how far He has brought you. I am believing for a complete healing. A crazy-miracle-kinda healing! I think you might have enough spunk in you, Jemma, to shock us all.

I can picture it as I write you... A mighty purpose and plan that God has for your life. Although small, you are going to greatly impact the world around you, more than you already have. You will be different than the average girl. You will grow in a strength that not many of us could handle, and you will have the scares to show your story. Jemma Sophia, embrace the scares, be proud of your uniqueness and individuality. Know your boundaries and understand your limits, but never let anyone tell you that you can't accomplish something. You are going to do amazing things! I will have the privilege of witnessing it! Since you have managed to fight with unbelievable endurance these past 10 days, I highly doubt the future will be able to contain your drive, tenderness and power. I am praying over your life continually. Myself and many others are so excited for the bright future ahead of you. I can't wait to hear your laugh and to see you smile. I can almost hear the sweet sound of your voice. Jemma Sophia, I am proud of who you are, already, and I will stand firmly in the hope and healing of Jesus and anxiously watch Him perform miracle after miracle in your life. I love you Jemma Sophia Starks, you are brilliantly created and designed as a beautiful masterpiece.

Your Forever,
Tunte Sheena


I give everything over to You Lord

Jemma Sophia Starks

We welcomed the darling Jemma Sophia Starks into the world Tuesday, October 8th at 5:22! A beautiful little girl that makes me so proud to be called aunt. There is nothing quite like the birth of a new baby and the celebration that surrounds the gift of life. The full head of dark hair and the puffy little cheeks brings the biggest smile to my heart. I was able to wrap her up in my arms, kiss her, talk to her, and tell her how much she's loved. Our sweet Jemma Sophia has no idea how many fans she has. Any baby born into our family becomes quite popular... quite fast! Jemma, you are brilliant!


Although we continue to celebrate the gift we call Jemma, there were some complications that occurred the day after her birth. Wednesday the 9th, in the morning, Rory and Stephanie, her parents, noticed that she was having a difficult time breathing. They sent a video clip to their midwife and she immediately responded and said, "Call 911." So they did, and the newly born Jemma was rushed to the hospital. I wasn't there upon their arrival, but my dad described it like a sense out of a movie. A security guard handed my brother Rory (Jemma's Dad) and my dad visitor badges to go into the NICU. They walked in the room to find 20 doctors and nurses running around getting Jemma oxygen, hooking her up to IV's and making sure they wasted no time with stabilizing her. Rory and my dad couldn't even see Jemma because there were so many people surrounding her. To call the scenario "intense," would be an understatement. 

Doctors said that they like to see people's oxygen levels around 90% and when Jemma was first brought into the ER, her oxygen levels were around 20%. She was not in good condition. Not everything has been figured out and they are still running several scans and tests, but they have concluded that she has a severe heart defect and will need surgery this week. We are praying against any long term affects. We don't want any seizures to occur now or in the future due to her time spent with such little oxygen. The most beautiful little doll has been through some much in her 2 1/2 short days of life. I believe she will make a full recovery and be completely healed. The doctors said she will have heart surgery in about a week and she will need to spend three more weeks recovering in the hospital. Needless-to-say, Rory and Stephanie and our families will be spending days and weeks and months in the hospital to ensure that our Little Jemma Sophia is made whole again! If you think about it, pray for everyone surrounding the situations; Jemma's parents, the doctors, India and Olive {Jemma's older sisters}, all the aunts and uncles and cousins and grandparents. We all would appreciate your love and support through prayer. So if you think about... Pray! We are very grateful for the blessing and joy Jemma Sophia has brought to all of our lives. Even in the midst of the chaos, she is beautiful, strong, and has officially melted all of our hearts. As her older sister calls her, "We love you Princess Jemma!" 

I give everything over to You Lord  

Daydreamer At Heart

There is nothing more enticing then my daydreams of traveling the world! Oh the idea of sipping coffee while walking through the brick-lined alleyways of Italy, or roaming the aisle's of the largest bookstore {Powells Book's} in Portland, Oregon. The inspiring thoughts of being a nomad and wondering, experiencing, and taking new adventures is so tempting to the free-spirited side of my soul! The romanticized view of my fantasies and my wishful thinking leave little room for reality and practicality! I suppose it wouldn't be such a charming daydream if I allowed logistics to ruin my minds unrestricted wondering! And let me tell you, recently, I have been practicing my wondering skills!

The realistic side of my daydreams always bring me back to earth. And it's back in reality that I remember how expensive traveling is (!), and how much preparation and time it takes to plan seemingly spontaneous getaways! While I understand the practical side of taking trips and seeing the world, I don't want to discount my desires altogether. I want channel it. To focus on ways that I can experience traveling and ways in which I can see the world, even if it's on a small scale.

For me, my dreams look like traveling and seeing the world. For you it might be something totally different. Your dreams may include a promotion at work or getting married and starting a family. Whatever your dream is, figure out how you can channel it. If your dream isn't being fulfilled right now, in this moment, sit down and really contemplate some of the small (maybe even practical) steps you can take. It could look like spending extra time learning about your business in order to be prepared and ready for if/when a promotion comes. Or it could look like learning how to trust God in a greater way, believing that He will bring a compatible partner when He sees fit.

Even if you have to start small, really, really small... It's okay! As cliche as this may sound, don't give up on your dreams. Continue a tireless pursuit to see them be fulfilled. Make your plans but let God order your steps!

I give everything over to You Lord

Time To Tip... And Tip Well

Awhile back my dad and I were out to lunch and it came time for the best part of the meal... the bill! ($$$) I have grown up seeing my dad tip based off of how well he was served and treated. And I really thought nothing about it when I was younger. Then I got older and got my first job at a coffee shop, where people tipped (or didn't) and it was THEN I realized the value of tipping people! Yes... Like tipping a server after a meal. So, before my dad paid for our meal, I shared some thoughts about the whole idea of tipping people based off of how "well" they treated me or how fast they served me. Here is what I shared with my dad:

I love people. I love to bless people, encourage people, and give them above and beyond what others may think they "deserve." That includes tipping. I have never based my "tipping-etiquette" on how well I am served or how "on top of it" my waiter or waitress was. And I'll be honest, I've had some pretty "bad" restaurant experiences. Anything from my server forgetting items I've requested (over and over), spilling drinks on me, one server wasn't able to concentrate due to his hungover, and other times I've simply had servers that are openly rude! (I call that being SPICY)! But that has never affected the dollar amount I write down on the little line that says, "Tip:  _____.____"  

WHY?! Well, I am sure we can break down that logic (tipping based off of being served well or not) and figure out a way to justify tipping poorly. But my thought process isn't based on logic it's based on blessing. And those are two very different entities! I correlate tipping to grace. Far fetched? I think NOT! You know that little thing God gives us no matter how many times we jack things up? Well... that's grace! It is an undeserved and free gift that is given to us, not based off of how WELL WE SERVE God, rather, it is based off of His greatness. I try to mimic the character that Jesus displays, such as giving generosity and giving above and beyond.

To me, tipping is more of a reflection of me and my character, opposed to the common thought that tipping is a reflection of the character and "performance" of the server.

You never know what people are walking through. Life is crazy! If you have air in your lungs, you'd understand that we all have "off" days. Even servers! (GASP!!) I'm sure we can all agree that we've had a day consumed by bad attitudes, grouches remarks and the lack of desire to serve others. So if you had the opportunity to shed a little generosity to the world, would you take it?

I want people to look at me and see God's love and His grace. For me, that looks like tipping, and tipping well. I guess my dad liked it enough to take on the same thought process. So now, we both tip well, because WE CAN! (Oh and if you can't afford to tip well... it's okay, maybe just eat in! And all the serves said, "AMEN!")

“Grace, then, is grace,–that is to say, it is sovereign, it is free, it is sure, it is unconditional, and it is everlasting.” ~ Alexander Whyte

I give everything over to You Lord